Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Nope not there yet

I have often wondered. "How do you know when you have hit bottom?" I mean no hope left, no more options, throw your hands up in the air, I give up, ROCK BOTTOM

Well, I think I know, but as I have learned from the Good Lord, when I say I know something, he has an uncanny way of proving me wrong and letting me know -"child you don't know as much as you think you do."

So, I am not going to say, "I have hit rock bottom!" and maybe I will begin to head up again.

A few things I have realized sitting here looking up.
- You have a totally different perspective of the world, people and family.
- You learn to be vulnerable, open and ask for help.
- There is no room for pride.
- If you are two laps behind "the Jones' " pretty good assumption you aren't going to "keep up" so give up!
- Nothing, Nothing is more important than your kids and their safety
- Nothing makes things OK like a smile and hug from them
- Be honest, with yourself, your spouse and God.

I am not going to say that I have taken all these steps but I have realized them. Now to act on them.

I love those ads that say, "Save for a rainy day" "our credit card says you money" "We can help you with our consolidation loans"

But what if, you can't get ahead to save, your ends cant see each other let alone meet.

What if you aren't eligible for that great 0% card? What if you aren't eligible for that great consolidation loan?

Why is it that those that need the help, cant get it? And those that don't, can?

The great mysteries of life. I think once you are caught in this horrible cycle of debt, it is like quicksand, the harder you try and struggle to get out, the deeper you go. Today, I have no more struggle in me, I just feel like sinking down and letting it consume me. Maybe it already has.

Pray with me,please...
Lord, help those that need it, put your arms around them and light that spark, that will to fight back and make it work. To do your will and be thankful for the small victories, to choose the right paths to go down and once they do, light that path with a bright light so they don't loose focus and keep on track.

Lord, you know the needs and the issues that each of your children hold. I pray you guide, nurture and lead them in your path and with your guidance and as hard as it may be for them, in your time.

Watch over and keep them, A-men.

I know each of you that read this and I hope you understand this is my outlet. this is my way of sharing my feelings, emotions, trials and tribulations so I can better understand them. I thank each of you for your love and support.


Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Letting God Lead

I am a strong beleiver in the Lord, and letting Him show me the way.
But I am finding that it is harder and harder to keep my nose out of it, so to speak, as I get older.

As I have grown, became a wife and a mother (twice), I find myself leaning more and more on the Lord for guidance and support. Which is how it should be, I think. However theses days, I do seem to hit bottom harder, than before. Now, I pray and pray for direction and his guidance and I am able to maneuver around most bumps in the road. But when that final rock or landslide, as it sometimes feels, falls in my path, I loose it. I question why... why me....why we can't catch a break, why we aren't being rewarded but punished for being good people.

Last night I was looking at videos and emails with a friend and I came across one that opened my eyes and made me ashamed of being so selfish.

It was a wife and mother that was tired of being invisible. She was given a book by a friend. A book of photos of great works of european architecture, of which none of the builders are known. The inscription read "for all the great unknown works you are creating"

At that point I realized, I am not suppose to be recognized. I am a mom, a wife, a sister, a daughter and a friend. I am doing what I am suppose to do. Just being me. Then I cried. I sobbed and sniffled and cried. My friend was here for me and understood totally what I was going through, without even knowing my problem or asking a quesiton.

The Lord had done it again. Everytime I have a "pitty party" for Cara, He brings be back to reality. The good Lord showed me exactly what I had needed at the exact right time. But he wasnt done with that.

I often listen to the local Christian radio station as I drive. This morning as I was driving one of my favorites was on. This pastor was discribing how, your thoughts can be your reason for failure. That even at your lowest, your lack of trust and believe can be leading you astray and away from the Lord and his plan for your life.

Here again, he placed me in the car at the right moment to hear that portion of the sermon. Just want I needed, just when I needed it.

I have realized today, no matter what life throws my way, no matter how many "bolders" roll in my path, I am held safe in the shelter of God. I have great unseen works still to create.

My only purpose, my only reason for doing any and everything I do is for my children. To create a safe, Christan, happy home that they always want to come back to.

I now pray He helps me do that, as He leads the way.

Friday, January 15, 2010

Today I received this wonderfully funny random email. She always knows EXACTLY what I need to read and when I need to read it.

So I thought I would share, pretty sure we all have these thoughts!

ENJOY

RANDOM THOUGHTS ....

Nothing is worse than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

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I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

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There is a great need for sarcasm font.

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Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what in hell was going on when I first saw it.

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How are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

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I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

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I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

_________________

I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

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How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

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I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front.. Stay strong, brothers & sisters !

________________

Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

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Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

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Bad decisions make good stories.

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You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.

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Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.

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I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper, and I swear I did not make any changes to it.

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I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? D@mnit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop dead?

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I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

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Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every early morn...

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It really ticks me off when I want to read a story on CNNcom and the link takes me to a video instead of text.

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I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet that on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Bud Light than with Kay..

SMILE ---- it makes people wonder ...

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Concern for Special Election next tuesday.

All of my Friends and Family in Taylor, Marion, Mercer, Nelson and Washington Counties.

I was born and raised in Taylor County and am very proud of that fact. As a child of this area, I feel you should know about the special election next Tuesday, December 8th, for Senate District Seat 14. The race is between Rep. Jimmy Higdon and Dem. Jodie Haydon.

First and foremost GO VOTE! Please go vote to voice your support for the horse industry. You can do that by knowing that Jodie Haydon is a FRIEND to the horse industry. Jodie will support the horse industry efforts and help move the industry forward and KEEP Kentucky the Horse Capital of the World.

Remember, Jimmy Higdon voted AGAINST our House Bill 2 this spring as a Representative from the area. HB2 would have allowed VLTs at KY Racetracks, Created a Equine Authority that would have allowed for funds for the non race industry for facilities and trails AND HB2 would have removed the sales tax off feed and equipment for horses.

Jodie Haydon supports this issue and wants to see something like HB2 be passed to support our industry.

If you have questions, please let me know.

Remember: GO VOTE NEXT Tuesday, DECEMBER 8th! AND, Jodie Haydon supports our industry and I would vote for him. And tell all your friends and family to go vote and encourage them to support Mr. Haydon.

Monday, November 23, 2009

As we gear up for Thanksgiving, I have to say, "What happened to October and November?" I have been so busy and stressed that the days are flying by and I am not keeping up. So, needless to say, my blogging has been a bit behind. I do good to get all my emails answered in a timely fashion.

Anyway, I have been thinking about what I wanted to say about Thanksgiving. I think we rush it, or the media and stores do. They jump from Halloween straight to Christmas. This passes right over one of my favorite holidays. I like them all don't get me wrong and Christmas is at the top for many reasons, but I am fond of Thanksgiving for many reasons too.

First - My Birthday is usually thanksgiving week. Yep, I was a turkey baby (hold the jokes please) but I loved the fact that EVERYONE was home for my Birthday party. Plus, I usually got fun stuff for my dinner, cause no one wanted typical dinner food.

Second - I LOVE FALL. And, Thanksgiving to me symbolizes fall. Leaves turning, cool crisp morning air, layering clothes (I love that) and cozy nights. We don't seem to get much fall anymore, especially this year. It was 70 degrees in November this year. What is that about?

Third - Thanksgiving was FAMILY time. Hanging out with cousins, aunts and uncles, JUST to EAT! how cool was that. and the Adults wanted to Play outside with us. Every kids dream.

Last - (But not least) I have always used this time to think about what a wonderful life the good Lord blessed me with. And I feel guilty and selfish for my petty problems and small issues I stress over. I was always THANKFUL for this.

So this Thanksgiving (and yes we are still having one) make sure to stop, look around and thank God for all he has blessed you with.


Monday, October 26, 2009

God's little speed bumps.

As I may have said, I think GOD has a sense of humor. Boy, has he been using it on me lately, well at least it feels like that. I have been working on a little (ok not so little) project for about 2 months now. This is a volunteer effort that should have been fairly easily, time consuming but easy.

Well, it hasn't been easy but it has been very time consuming. One speed bump after another after another and today..... A full blown ROAD BLOCK. all my work gone and not sure it can be recovered. I hope I don't have to start from scratch, but that is a possibility.

I am not sure why the sudden road block, right as I am about to finish this "little journey" but I am sure it will be clear in time. Maybe just to teach me a life lesson of paying attention and having patience? who knows ???

All I can do now is take a deep breath, refocus and start again. Ahhhh those speed bumps can be fun !!!

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Maybe I'm Crazy

Well, since I last talked to you I am venturing into (again) the world of direct sales. I have decided to try my hand at selling wonderful Lia Sophia Jewelry. This is wonderfully jewelry that I have been wearing for over a year now. Very nice quality for daily use or special events. If you are interested in seeing their product visit Lia Sophia at www.liasophia.com, they have something for everyone. AND, it is always buy two get one half off (your most expensive can be the 1/2 off)

Now, here is where the crazy part comes in, I am also beginning to sell Scentsy candles which are wickless, flameless scents that are completely safe for kids and pets in the home. Also, there are more than 80 wonderful scents to choose from. Again, visit www.scentsy.com to see all the wonderful warmers and scents.

In the coming months I will be full advisors for each wonderful company and have my own website where you can order products or contact me.

How am I doing this you ask? I have decided I waste way too much time sleeping. hehe.

Til next time.